Sunday, November 14, 2010

emotional roller coaster much?

Since getting into TFA, I've been on quite the emotional roller-coaster.

roller coaster Pictures, Images and Photos

I got the email, and I was so relieved that I came as close as I ever have to hyperventilating. I was sitting on the floor in a hallway in the Humanities Building, and I sunk down against the wall and almost started crying

The relief gave way to shock and disbelief. This still hasn't worn off, but there's been some sub-categories of emotions since then.

Once I found out about all of the tests I have to take and the math I have to learn, my relief gave way to abject panic. I have to learn calculus, which I haven't even studied, and I haven't thought about math in YEARS.

The panic sort of wore of and I realized that I can study, so I ordered a test prep book and bought a graphing calculator, one of the last things on EARTH I thought I'd ever spend $120 on.

While waiting for my test prep book to arrive (hopefully it will tomorrow), my mood has become restless anxiety. I want to start preparing as much as I can, but there's really nothing helpful I can/should do right now. I'm not moving for seven months, and it'd be pointless to do a lot of the things I want to do.

And the dumb TFA blogging website won't let me create a blog, which I've been dying to do since like May. Maybe it's God telling me to CALM DOWN.

I'm bored at the moment, and yet I still don't want to go to work in an hour. And I'll probably be all cranky at work and want to leave.

Blech.

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